kissedWhen I got to her we held hands and to show to her that I really love her, I kissed her lips and we were to continue in the romance game when someone called her name…..


“Look, the virgin boy is coming” says Frank and everyone burst into laughter, “what’s up guys” I greeted my friends who were chatting under a tree in the school compound. “we are cool” they replied sarcastically. Frank continued with his story ikissedJezebelabout what happened between him and his girlfriend the previous night, how they were both having a fling with each other and were almost caught by his dad, everyone laughed. John also narrated how he got into the sexual act at the age of 14 through their baby sitter who introduced him into sex when ever his parents were not around, everyone in the group took turn to narrate their sexual experiences and sharing their fantasies and at the same time discussing about the girls in their class, mentioning those they had slept with and those they perceived were still virgins and those they were still working on to get down.

I got home that day with several imaginations going on in my mind, I was wondering why I had never had sex with any girl at the age of 16. Soon I started satisfying my sexual fantasies and sexual drive by watching porn secretly at home when my parents were not at home and started downloading naked pictures of girls and videos on my mobile phone to watch alone in the night when others were sleeping or when I was in the bathroom, I began to masturbate and the urge to have sex became so strong on me, and soon I began to crave for opportunities to engage in premarital sex contrary to my good moral upbringing and all the messages from my youth church and numerous singles summit I had attended.

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I began to lose concentration in school and the word of God was not having effect any longer on me, the girls in my street were not helping matters as they were fond of appearing in all manners of seductive looks and dressing to my admiration. Soon I got introduced to Jennifer by my friends and we started dating, we would talk all through the night (mid-night calls, and chat), soon we started engaging in phone sex and other sexual fantasies, to cut the long story short, when the opportunity came, we had sex, after the first encounter I felt very bad about it, I was down with guilt and shame, but soon summoned courage after discussing the experience with my friends. I was no longer taking part in Sunday school activities anymore and gradually I backslided unknown to my parents and even leaders in the church even though I still attend services, I became a pretender.

My friends were happy about my new experience and way of life; gradually I was introduced to smoking and started getting involved in several other evil activities. In no time I started going to brothels to have sex with prostitutes and became addicted to the red lights districts in town.

One day, I saw a beautiful girl beckoning on me to come closer in the middle of a big field, I was afraid initially but when she said to me “Ken come closer I love you”, I summoned courage, I assumed probably she knew me somewhere, and more so her beauty was irresistible, she had all what a guy wants in a lady. When I got to her we held hands and to show to her that I really love her, I kissed her lips and we were to continue in the romance game when someone called her name, “Jezebel”! We quickly stopped and she told me she would get back to me shortly. I was there fantasizing about the strange encounter when she suddenly appeared in company of other girls with knives and arrows in their hands coming to get me, I took to my heels and was running so fast, but Jezebel caught up with me and was about to stab me with the knife when I suddenly and luckily woke up. “Oh thank God it was a dream” I said, I just waved it off as one of those nightmares and slept off again, it was later I understood the meaning of the dream.

Couple of days after, I accompanied my friends to a night party in the company of their girlfriends, a fight broke out between some rival cult guys at the party, there was a shootout, I and my friends managed to escaped from the venue but had a fatal accident on our way home, Jennifer died in the accident but I managed to survive but had my right leg amputated as a result of severe damage to the leg. My amputated leg and Jenifer’s death served as a great lesson for me, each time I remembered my parents and pastor’s admonitions about the consequences of living a bad life as a youth and the need to abstain from sexual immoralities and the dream God used to warn me to desist from chasing after girls for immoralities, I broke down in tears and today I have joined the campaign against all forms of social vices committed by young people especially the fight against sexual immoralities.

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Another story below was told by a wise man several hundred years ago: read carefully

I was looking out the window of my house one day, and saw among the simple, I perceived among the youths, a young man devoid of understanding (lacking common sense), passing along the street near her corner; and he took the path to her house, In the twilight, in the evening, In the black and dark night. 

And there a woman met him, with the attire of a harlot (dressed seductively), and a crafty heart. She was loud and rebellious, her feet would not stay at home. At times she was outside, at times in the open square, Lurking at every corner. So she caught him and kissed him; with an impudent face she said to him: “I have peace offerings with me; today I have paid my vows. So I came out to meet you, diligently to seek your face, and I have found you. My bed is spread with colored sheets of finest linen imported from Egypt. I have perfumed my bed with myrrh, aloes, and cinnamon.

 Come, let us take our fill of love until morning; Let us delight ourselves with love. For my husband is not at home; He has gone on a long journey; He has taken a bag of money with him, and will come home on the appointed day.” With her enticing speech she caused him to yield, with her flattering lips she seduced him. Immediately he went after her, as an ox goes to the slaughter, Or as a fool to the correction of the stocks, till an arrow struck his liver. As a bird hastens to the snare, He did not know it would cost his life.

Now therefore, listen to me, my children; Pay attention to the words of my mouth: Do not let your heart turn aside to her ways, Do not stray into her paths; For she has cast down many wounded, And all who were slain by her were strong men. Her house is the way to hell, descending to the chambers of death.

The above story was told by Solomon in Proverb 7: 6-27 (kjv + nlt).

 Many guys think sex is all about capturing a girl, defiling her and using her for their own pleasure, not knowing that they are also being used the same way like the girl, when a guy sleeps with a lady both of them are devalued and lose virtues. Though the guy might not be pregnant but he’s not immune to the consequences of pre-marital sex! Each time you engage in fornication or sexual immoralities the devil is happy knowing well that you are in his trap, and a slave to the daughters of Jezebel.

The bible says “he that commit fornication lacks understanding, he that does it, destroys his own soul” and equally warns “flee fornication, every sin that a man commits is without the body but he that commit fornication sin against his own body, what! Know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit which is in you, which ye have of God and ye are not of your own. For you are bought with a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit which are God’s”- 1 Cor 6: 16-20

Proverbs 16:25 says; there is a way that seems right unto a man, but the end therof are the ways of death.

Premarital sex is a killer, it disconnects you from God’s plan for your life, it makes you vulnerable to satanic attacks, the bible says he that is joined with a harlot is one body with her (1 Cor. 6:15) when you have sex with a girl, you have united your soul with that girl and must be ready to share any curse on her.

Some guys go to have sex with prostitutes secretly and think no one is aware, you are only killing yourself and destroying your destiny, like we read above, her room is the way to hell, descending to the chambers of death and this is true for every girl you have sex with.

Premarital sex also distract you from the purpose of God for your life, look at the length of time you invest in planning how to get a girl, all the mid-night calls, long hours of immoral thoughts and lack of concentration about your career, studies, and life generally. The thoughts of her and how to have her in bed make you sick everyday like Amnon in the bible (read 2 Sam. 13: 1- 32).

Are you in a sex trap? Are you addicted to sex? Do you always masturbate? And fill your imaginations with all sorts of sexual fantasies? Are you addicted to pornography (blue film), you can’t do without seeing girls nakedness, your phone is filled with all kinds of sexually explicit materials (pictures and sex video), you can’t control your emotions anytime you see anything in skirt and blouse, even in the church, the sight of beautiful girls sets you on fire of lust, sometimes you peep through bathroom key hole to watch girls taking their bath including your own blood related sisters! You are fond of sexually abusing little girls when no one is watching, you have raped girls to fulfill your sexual desires, and sometime take part in gang rape and all sort of sexual abuse against girls. And when you are in class your eyes keep wandering to see if you can get the sight of girls who are probably sitting carelessly so you can see their underwear! Jesus said “But I say unto you, that whosoever looks on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart” (Mathew 5:28)

Maybe yours is smoking, drinking alcohol, you belong to a cult group, stealing, fighting, and other evil things that characterizes the life of so many youths. No matter what your sin may be, I want to announce to you that the plaster is wider than the wound; you can be cleansed and become a child of God.

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You can be made whole If only you can just tell God you are sorry, ask Him to forgive you and accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. He will cleanse you and make you pure; He will heal you of any sickness or disease you have contracted. He will make you a brand new person. Today you can become born again, you can start a new life, the bible says “if any man be in Christ, He is a new creature, old things are passed away (including all your past immoral life) behold, all things have become NEW!!!

Say this simple prayer “Lord Jesus, I have seen myself as a sinner, Forgive me all my sins, cleanse me with your blood. I confess and accept Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. Let all the works of darkness be destroyed in my life. Thank you Lord for accepting me as your child, let my name be written in the book of life. Thank you Jesus, in Jesus name I pray (amen)

If you have prayed this prayer whole heartedly, I want to happily welcome you to God’s sweet family. As you have received forgiveness, you must forgive all those that have despitefully used and hurt you. The bible says forgive and you shall be forgiven!

Have you been sexually abused even as a guy? Or you know you are addicted to sex and have tried several times to be free but you are entangled. Feel free to talk to us, a problem shared is a problem solved.

For further counseling and questions, feel free to send an email to

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I’m your friend,
Paul Ojomu.

Read other articles on this blog:
He took off my underwear
My uncle had sex with me
How to attract the right guy
Single, Saved and Sexual…Understanding your sex drive
Once upon a Valentine
Pornography: The way out
and many more…

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